The View
In the morning
usually bright, warm
I can see miles from the
fire escape.
The windows of the places
where busy people
spend their days
wink at me
laughing, not so friendly,
yet they draw me to
the edge of my view.
And I look down
and see a single blossom
amongst a field of weeds,
a neighbor's garden grinning
a toothless smile.
If you love me,
you will come
and sit with me here
on such a lovely morning.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
In Creeley's poem I could feel the rain coming down . In yours I can feel openness and heat of the morning sun. I think you capture his tone nicely.
ReplyDeleteThe last two stanzas of your poem really pop out to me, especially when you compare a blossom to "a toothless smile". That sort of paradoxical language shows that you imitated Creeley's style quite nicely. Good job
ReplyDelete-Alex
I really enjoyed reading this. The way the line breaks forces the reader to see what you have to say, but the way you wrote made me eager to see what you had to say.
ReplyDeletei love this. Every morning i sit out on my fire escape with coffee and cigarette, so this poem really resonated with me. Awesome job taking Creeley's style and applying it to your own voice.
ReplyDelete