Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My 'Uncomfortable High School Reunion' Waltz

One hand on mine, the other clasped around

A tiny plastic cup filled with courage

The smell in the glass, the smell of your breath

Your conforting chest rests against mine with confidence

Inebriated beyond comprehension you smile

Not caring about our not so innocent past

The sway of the music, the naughtiness of your hips

Tensing the moment more than it needs to be

My hand rests on your back, you slide it down

Whispering in my ear thoughts of passion

I steer you away as different eyes match mine

My friend, your ex, examines our embrace

Jason Yelland


  1. I really like how you kept the same rhythm and theme of alcohol to the My Papa's Waltz, but changed the message to a lighter tone, but a very familiar tone. "Inebriated beyond comprehension you smile Not caring about our not so innocent past" I thought these lines were very effective and relatable.

  2. i like that this is about a high school reunion because the images so accurately reflect the high school experience (insecurity,innocence, temptation, jealousy)

  3. What an interesting imitation! Enjoyed reading it. I love the whole high school experience you chose to work with :)

  4. I thought this was such a small moment explained so well. I especially liked how you talked about eyes glancing. Such a small detail that explains so much.

  5. I like the unusual structure of the piece, making it feel sort of choppy and awkward as if the speaker was not originally a great waltzer. There is a sort of rhythm that mimics the style of dancing as well. It is very effective.


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