Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Get Fucked

Sorry if the vulgarity of this offends. This is a imitation of Charles Baudelaire's "Get Drunk". I rather enjoyed the original.

Get Fucked

You should always be in the perpetual state of being fucked. I mean, if you’re going to be the prisoner of everything, of the continuous motion of time and solitude and loneliness and emotion and judgments, then you should be getting yourself fucked.
You may be asking what exactly getting fucked means. You can get fucked with almost anything: a dick, a cucumber, a broken heart, a dastardly curse that has plagued your family for centuries. Try a little lube; it’ll mend those cracks that you’ve lived with for ages.
If the continual fucking gets to be a bit too much, and you happen to black out and wake up where the fairies dream, or in the lake that shows your reflection, or by the backyard slip-n-slide that you used to delight in a kid, look to the water or the architecture and scream “Please sir, may I have some more? I’m dying of reality and it’s beginning to hurt a little bit. Look! I’m bleeding from my aorta.” Hopefully, the buildings will scream back and point you towards the nearest vegetable garden so you can get fucked once again. After all, they understand what it’s like to be tread on for centuries, never shaking their curses, never shedding the emotions, and they can’t get fucked, like you.

6 comments:

  1. But I don't wanna be in a continuous state of being fucked! This was a funny spin on get drunk, I liked it.

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  2. I thought this was a very clever spin on "get drunk", taking the initial idea and pulling it one step further. This piece seemed to be a little more serious than the original one that it was mimicking, but it was still successful nonetheless. I enjoyed it.

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  3. I like your spin on the "with wine, with poetry, or with virtue" line. "a dick, a cucumber, a broken heart, a dastardly curse that has plagued your family for centuries" Nice. I think this is such an important line because it opens the piece to a universal level, to a huge range of interpretations that actually make it more personal to the reader.

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  4. I liked your post because it was a pretty different take on Charles' poem. I like the vulgarity!

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  5. Clever! The last line, "...and they can't get fucked, like you" wraps it up perfectly. I liked this a lot.

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  6. Awesome! Good job on risking offense and making this piece vulgar. I really enjoyed this version of Get Drunk, it was funny and truthful-Good work!

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